World Local News – Small Dog Picked Up by Pound Turns Out To Be Particularly Unattractive Toddler

MELBOURNE – After closer inspection, a Melbourne, FL dog pound realized that the small dog they had captured and put in a three-foot holding pen was actually 8-year-old Bobby Umms.

“It’s certainly not one of our prouder moments, I tell you what”, was Deputy Ryan Masko’s first thought.  Neighbor’s reported an animal resembling a miniature terrior at the Fort Meade Playground.  According to posted signs, pets are not allowed in the park, which is what sparked the call to authorities.

Mr. Masko explained, “when we showed up, little Bobby started running away from us and making sounds like he was growlin’ or yappin’ or something.”  The deputy, afraid of getting bitten, used a net that is fired from a hand held device.  “We used our net-immobiizer and were able to quickly subdue the poor kid.  But then he was squirming so much and fighting that we had to hit it with a couple of tranquilizing darts.  That did the trick. The critter went limp, I tell you what.”

The child did not have any identification on him so not matter a pet or a human, there was no easy way to identify the owner/parents.  But once the effects of the tranquilizers wore off, Bobby was able to calmly explain who his parents were.

“When that little thing started talking, well I gotta tell ya, I thought that that little dog had gotten possessed or satanified!”, the deputy explained nervously, “But then when he told us his name, we came out from behind our desk and let him out of his pen.”

Bobby was reunited with his father, who decided the whole incident was particularly amusing.

“Can’t say it hasn’t happened before”, Mr. Umms laughed as he turned to leave, “now, let’s go find you a hydrant.”

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